What is a 419? It is a code given to a specific scam. This scam is sent either by mail or email. It usually has something to do with the death of a government official or so-called relative. The following is a 419 I received, but be careful – many of guys that send these are dangerous characters. In NO WAY did I actually send this clown any of my information.

Saturday, April 24th 2004

Email I received from “Kenneth Tyler:”

“Mr. Kenneth Tyler
Commonwealth Bank of Australia.
99 Queen Street, Melbourne
VIC 3000,Australia.
Date: 23rd April, 2004

Dear friend,

This is a proposal in context but actually an appeal
soliciting for your unreserved assistance in
consummating an urgent transaction requiring
maximum confidence. Though this approach appears
desperate, I can assure you that whatever questions
you would need to ask or any other thing you will need
to know regarding this proposal will be adequately
answered to give you a clearer understanding of it, so
as to arrive at a successful
conclusion.

My name is Mr. Kenneth Tyler, Head of Securities,
Commonwealth Bank of Australia, Melbourne. On February
17, 2002, a foreign consultant/contractor with the
Asea Brown and Boveri Ltd, Mr. Enrique Salcedo, made a
numbered time (fixed) Deposit for twelve calendar
months, valued at US$20,000,000.00, (Twenty Million
United States Dollars) in my branch. Upon maturity, I
sent a routine notification to his forwarding address
but got no reply. After a month, I sent a reminder and
finally we discovered from his contract employers,
Asea Brown and Boveri (the energy giant), that Mr.
Salcedo died from an automobile accident.
On further investigation, I found out that he died
without making a WILL, and all attempts to trace his
next of kin was fruitless. I therefore made further
investigation and discovered that Mr. Salcedo did not
declare any next of kin or relations in all his
official documents, including his Bank Deposit
paperwork in our Bank.
Due to the funds being temporarily unclaimable, the
funds have being moved out of our bank ( as sundry
funds )to an offshore Deposit
Company in the European Union.

>From past experiences, I know that no one will ever
come forward to claim the deceased funds. According to
Australian Law, at the expiration of 5 (five) years,
the funds will be Unclaimable and revert to the
ownership of the Australia Government if nobody
applies to claim the fund.
In order to avert this negative development, I in
conjunction with a colleague (the Chief Operating
Officer in the bank)now seek your permission to allow
my attorney do a CHANGE OF OWNERSHIP/REASSIGNMENT OF
CREDIT of stated funds from the “deceased” to your
name, so that the funds (US$20million) would be
released to you as the new owner (on behalf of me and
my colleague).
We are writing you because, as public servants, we
cannot operate a foreign account or have an account
that is more than AUS$160,000:00. Consequently, you
will be presented as the owner of the funds in the
Deposit Company so you can be able to claim them,
after all necessary paperwork has being effected.
For us to commence, I will like you to provide the
following information immediately;

1. Full names
2. Contact address
3. Telephone and fax numbers

Once I receive these information, I will prepare the
necessary documents which will put you in place as the
new owner of the funds. The money will then be
released to your custody by the Deposit Company, for
us to share in the ratio of 70% for us and 30% for
you.
There is no risk at all as all the paperwork for this
transaction will be done by the solicitor and this
will guarantees the successful execution of this
transaction.
If you are interested, please reply via my email
address. Upon your response, I shall then provide you
with more details, and further explanation that will
help you understand the transaction.

No doubt this proposal will make you apprehensive,
please we imploy you to observe utmost confidentiality
and be rest assured that this transaction would be
most profitable for both of us because we shall
require your assistance to invest our share in your
country (Real estate and any other ideas you may
have), this is why your urgent action and response is
of great essence which will enable us conclude this
transaction in a timely and professional manner.

I await your swift response hoping you accept my
proposal, as time is of equal essence in this project
as well as is confidentiality.

Thank you and have a nice day.

Respectfully yours,

Mr. Kenneth Tyler.”


 

My reply, and the reply… The Doctor is in!!:

Mr. Tyler,

This is an interesting proposition you have here. I guess I’m at a loss
for what you need from me. Am I understanding this right? You want to
transfer $20,000,000.00 into my bank account? Then what will you do with
it, once it’s in my possession? I will then wire 30% back to you?

Please let me know what I can do to help.

Regards,

Jack Kavorkian, MD


 

His reply to me, again – …in need of some ID? Gonna have do some Photoshop magic! Fake driver’s licenses, anyone?

From: Kenneth Tyler
To: Jack Kavorkian
Date: 24/04/04.

Dear Friend,

I received your email and I wish to thank you
immensely for your kind interest in this
transaction.

In furtherance to your response in which you
indicated your interest, I hereby convey the approval
of my colleague that I continue discussion with you on
this our mutual beneficial project.
Before I intimate you on our perfected modalities to
ensure a 100% successful project, it is imperative
that we re-affirm the need for utmost confidentiality
in this project due to the nature and magnitude. The
need for this cannot be over-emphasized as we are
interested in not only the completion of the project
and the transfer of the proceeds into your nominated
account, but most importantly our 100% guarantee that
we will enjoy the proceeds of this project with
absolute peace of mind.

As long as you follow my instructions strictly,
accordingly and religiously, neither your interest nor
mine will be jeopardized on account of this project.

Actually, this transaction is 100% risk free and
does not relate to any breach of law or proceeds from
drugs or terrorism. The funds will be released legally
and all necessary precautions have been taken to
safe-guard the intended beneficiary and us by
following all the regulations of the authorities. It
is a matter of necessity to continue with you in this
transaction without further investigation about your
person. I hope you would not betray this trust.
Due to our current status, we cannot acquire the
funds in our name, due to reasons you are aware of
(our first correspondence).
Before going further, I would want to bring to your
notice that due to our positions in the bank, we are
under constant surveillance by the Internal Control
Unit (ICU) of the bank. Therefore, it will be most
obliged if both of us have at the bottom of our heart
that confidentiality comes before anything in this
pending project.
In a nutshell, confidentiality should be regarded and
seen as a virtue we must adhere to.
The funds were transferred with the co-operation and
assistance of a funds management deposit company to an
offshore bank in Europe. This was imperative because
of the impossibility in transferring the funds
directly, hence the use of the funds management
company.
How do we plan to achieve this?
Our modalities to ensure a successful, risk free and
hitch free business deal are as follows.

1. You will have to scan and send via email any
means of identification you have. Apart from using the
copies as beneficiary identification, it will still be
for our mutual security, protection and
familiarization.

2. After I receive copies of your ID, I will contact
a reputable attorney to assist us in getting all the
legal documents to back our project. The attorney will
also send an application to the bank on behalf of the
next of kin requesting for a re-assignment of credit
from the deceased, and transfer the funds to you.
When all this is accomplished, the Commonwealth Bank
will contact the Deposit Company notifying them of
your beneficiary status, complying, the Deposit
Company will prepare a reassignment of credit in your
favour.

3. Note that the Deposit Company in Europe will
contact you to commence the release of the funds after
receiving the remittance instructions from the Bank
via the contact information you have provided,
therefore the dedicated contact information, that is
your telephone and fax numbers and your physical
address should be given.

4. We have agreed to give you 30% of the total money
as your commission for your assistance and
cooperation.

5. We will get the attorney to draft a FUNDS
MANAGEMENT AGREEMENT that will be entered into by you
and I to protect both our interests in this
transaction.

I want to restate here that trust, honesty of
purpose and confidentiality are important virtues we
must abide to in this transaction. I am assuring you
with God as my witness that this deal is 100% risk and
hitch free and all modalities have been perfected to
ensure that we are successful.

Once again, I thank you for your response to my
letter, and look forward to having a nice working
relationship with you.

Have a nice day, as I await a swift response from
you.
Best wishes,
Kenneth Tyler.


 

Monday April 26, 2004

Who wants to play god?!

Kenneth,

Please be patient, as I will be having my son scan my drivers license so that I may email it to you later this week. I would have liked to have this completed by now, but I have many people in my care. Many are going through trying times, and I try to help them put an end to the circumstances they are in.

As for the religious statements which you have made, I am not a religious person. God has nothing to do with whether a person lives or dies. Only people influence life and death, God does not.

Please expect to hear from me later this week.

J. Kavorkian


 

Tuesday April 27, 2004

Trust…? Sure…

Dear Sir,

Thank you for your response to my email.

I am very grateful that you hav decided to assist me
in this project.

As regards the drivers license,I will wait patiently
for it, so we can start this project.

I will keep you informed daily via email, fax and
phone until the funds are transferred into your
account, for us all. I must state at this point that I
am putting great trust in you, and I hope you will not
let me down.

Thank you

Best regards,
Kenneth Tyler.


Thursday April 29th, 2004

Patience is a virtue, Kenneth!

Dear Sir,

I am writing to say that today is Thursday, and I am
still in the wait for your identification, so we can
get this project moving.

Please do send it as soon as possible.

Best regards,
Kenneth.


Saturday May 1st, 2004

Okay, okay – today it is…

Dear Sir,

I am writing to say that I am still in the wait for a
response to my email.

Please do let me know the position of things, as
regards getting the identification, so we can start
this project.

I await your urgent response,

Best regards,
Kenneth.


Here’s my reply…

Kenneth,

My apologies for not getting back to you sooner. I’ve been out of town on business. Find a copy of my drivers license attached (my son had to show me how to do that).

Please keep me informed as to the status of the situation, and let me know if there is anything else I need to do.

Regards

Jack


And just a couple of hours later…

Dear Sir,

I am writing to say that I am in receipt of your email
and your identifiction.

I will get in touch with the Attorney to send an
application on your behalf to the commonwealth bank.

I will also send you a copy of the application sent in
on your behalf.

Thank you very much for this opportunity you have
given me.

Best regards,
Kenneth.


Monday May 3rd, 2004

Wadda ya know?! Jack’s related to ENRIQUE JOSE SUAREZ SALCEDO! If he wasn’t already dead I’d bet his relative Jack could help him along…

Dear Sir,

Thank you for your email, and your identification.
Further to that, we have been able to make a lot of
progress, as on receipt of your email, I immediately
contacted the Attorney (Mack Bailey) who inturn has
immediately sent a letter of application on your
behalf to the bank.

I am sending the copy of the letter the Attorney sent
to the bank.

All we have to do now is to wait for the bank to
respond back to Mack Bailey. I will let you know as
soon as they do.

Please confirm receipt of this email,as we have
commenced this project together, I hope you will not
let me down.

Thank you for your assistance.

Best regards,
Kenneth Tyler.

“Special Risks Department”? What, are they related to “Law & Order”?


Wednesday May 5th, 2004

Ah…. at last we are getting down to it. I guess you really can’t get something for nothing. But Kenneth will soon find out how little Jack knows about the Internet, and how little he believes in electronic banking, growing up during the great depression and all…

Dear Sir,

Thanks for your email.

The bank sent a letter to mack Bailey today,
acknowledging receipt of the application made on your
behalf for the claim of the funds.
The bank has requested that documents to support the
claim as next of kin to the deceased should be made
available, and also a well endorsed power of attorney
from you making Mack Bailey & Associates your legal
representative should be made available to the bank
immediately.

As soon as we received the above information, we
immediately swung into action. I am attaching a draft
of the Power of Attorney. Please retype on your
letterhead if you have one, or on a plain sheet
filling in your name, address and dates in the spaces
provided for that on the draft, sign it, and send it
back to me asap after scanning by email attachment.
The attorney will register the POA at the High Court
tomorrow, for onward submission to the Commonwealth
Bank.

As regards the supporting document showing your next
of kin status, the attorney is putting all the
necessary pressure on the officials at the Probate
Registry, so that the LETTER OF ADMINISTRATION can be
issued without any further delays. As soon we get all
this very vital documentation, the attorney will
submit them to the bank for further processing.
The attorney has informed me that his legal charges
will be 20,000 australian dollars. He is requesting
for a 50% settlement of the claim now,and the balance
on ompletion of his legal obligation to you. He is
also requesting for an additional 10,000 australian
dollars to cover the cost of perfecting the above
mentioned documentation which will be instrumental to
the finalisation of the re-assignment of credit
process with the Commonwealth Bank of Australia.
Due to funds unavailability, I have appealed to him
that we wil give him just 10,000 AUD now which I have
already paid to him from my purse, to balance the
remaining 20,000 AUD on arrival of the funds in your
account.

Please send the completed and signed copy of the power
of attorney
 asap, as time is of great essence in this
project, as well as is confidentiality.

Till I hear from you. bye.

Best wishes,
Ken.


Wednesday May 12th, 2004

Oops… I don’t think he likes being put off!

Dear Sir,

I hope thie email meets you in good condition.

Please I need the Power of Attorney I sent to you as
soon as possible, so we can move on with this project.
It has taken too long as it is now.

I await your swift response,

Best regards,
Kenneth


hmmm… guess I’ll put him off some more…

Kenneth,

I apologize for the delay. I have not had time to have the form scanned. I
will have it to you in a day or two.

Regards,

Jack


Thurday May 13th, 2004

So he waits…

Dear Sir,

Thank you for your email I will wait for the scanned
document.

Thank you.
kenneth.


And a couple of days later…

Dear Sir,

Please what is the position with the power of
attorney?

Time is of the essence.

Thank you,
Kenneth.


Well, since time is of the essence

Kenneth

I have finally had time to have this document scanned. Sorry for the
delay, but here it is.

Doc Jack


Friday May 14th, 2004

Oh how nice! We can open the champagne!! It’s amazing how quickly this moved through an investigation department (over night?)!

Dear Sir

I am writing to say that I have collected a copy of
the Letter of Administration from Mack Bailey, as he
has submitted the original and the Power of attorney
to the bank that you sent.

Furthermore, I have been doing some underground work
at the international remittance dept at the bank to
find out what the likely outcome will be, as you are
well aware due to obvious reasons, I cannot go
outright and ask, as by so doing, I will be telling
everybody that I have vested interest in the
re-assignment of the funds. However my friend, from
what I have been able to gather, we are right on
track. The file has been approved by the investigation
dept; there are two other approvals that the file
needs to pass through, then the final approval which
should be from the Manager International remittance.
Once we get that, then my friend we can open the
champagne.

As soon as we get the final approval, you will be
asked to contact the Deposit company, and do the
normal ratification exercise.

I will keep you posted.

Thank you
Kenneth.


Monday May 17th, 2004

Okay, now he’s asking for it… money that is…

Dear Sir,

I hope this letter meets you in good health.

However, there is very great likelihood that once the
funds have been approved here, the deposit company:
Baseline Securities, will ask you to present yourself
in the Netherlands for the final ratification and
endorsement exercise. My friend, I know this will come
as a shock, but if this is the case, then we can
consider ourselves more than lucky, as all has gone as
planned. After hearing that you will need to travel to
endorse at Baseline, I have been in touch with
Baseline, and told them that a friend of mine should
be coming soon, and I hinted them that you are
supposed to come for the release of some funds that
was left to you, that after the funds have been
released, they should please assist you in opening an
account in a local bank in the Netherlands, and
depositing it as there is no way you can travel such
amount of money. Please let me know if you are
disposed to going for the meeting with Baseline in the
Netherlands?

On the other hand, I have also found out that it is
possible for us to have the funds transferred into
your account directly without you going to meet with
the officials in the Netherlands, however in this case
we will have to present an Insurance Bond from a
reputable insurance company here in Australia. This
Insurance Bond is to back up the funds enroute transit
to your account. This law has been effected in
Australia that any amount more than US$ 8,000,000.00
being transferred out of Australia will have to be
backed up by an Insurance Bond.
I have contacted a very recognized insurance company
here in Australia, and the cost of the Bond came up to
US$14,500. My friend, I do not have this kind of
money to get this bond, as I have already poured all
the funds I had into this project. So I ask you if you
can come up with these funds to get the Insurance
Bond, or will you prefer to travel to the Netherlands
to meet with Baseline? I will please like a response
to this so that I can have the Attorney tell the bank
what option we intend to follow.

My Friend, I want to thank you for your assistance in
this project, I sincerely hope that all we have worked
for comes to reality in the next couple of days.

I will really like for you to give me some business
advice, I am sure we will have a lot of time to talk
after you have received the funds.
Thank you and God bless.

Best regards,
Kenneth Tyler.


And then he gets impatient!!! Christ!

Dear Sir,

I am writingto ask if you are in receipt of my
previous email?

Please do let me know what your position is, as time
is of the essence in the project, now that we have
gotten to the end of it.

Please do send me a number where I can reach you on.

Thank you,
Kenneth.


Hmmm….. what to do… maybe killing will help me think!

Kenneth,

First I must say that I am surprised. I was of the understanding that this
would be a risk-free investment.

Now, that being said, I am not opposed to flying to the Netherlands, as I
have family there that I have not seen in quite some time. I do find it
odd, however, that I would need to take a trip to the opposite side of the
globe from where the money is.

I must have a few days to ponder my position. You see, I currently have a
patient that is in need of assistance in his final hours. I must see to it
that I am there for him.

I will let you know of my decision soon.

Jack


So far Kenneth doesn’t seem to mind my travelling to the Netherlands! I’m shoucked!! But he does seem really interested in obtaining my phone and fax numbers…

Dear Sir,

I am very grateful for your email.

This project is risk-free and hitch-free like I
mentioned earlier.
The reason for this trip is that Baseline Securities,
the deposit company where the funds was moved to from
the onset, will like for you to come for the
ratification and endorsement exercise.

The reason for this is that they have had a very bad
experience where funds was released to the wrong
person. Owing to this fact, they therefore made it
mandatory for the Beneficiary to present him/herself
in person.
This is why I also made mention of the other
alternative we have, which is to have the funds
transfered to your account, but we will have to get an
insurance cover from a reputable Insurance company for
this to take place, and the fee involved is US$14,500.
Presently, I cannot afford this funds, as I have spent
all I have and the loans I have taken to get this
project to this stage.

My Friend, I had to be open to you, that is why I have
presented the whole picture to you.

I will await your response.

Best regards,
Kenneth.

NB: Please do give me your phone and fax numbers, so
Ican send the letter from the Common wealth bank to
you.


Wednesday May 19th, 2004

Killing, er, uh, euthanasia is my business, and business is good! Don’t bother me Kenneth! I’ve got work to do…

Dear Sir,

I hope this email meets you and your family in good
health.

Further to your last email, how is your patient doing?
I do hope all is well with the patient.

Please I hate to come on as a border, but please what
is your position as regards going to the Netherlands?
Or do we cling on to the option of getting an
Insurance Bond if your schedule is too tight?

Also I have been meaning to bring up the issue of
confidentiality which can never be undermined, since
you said that you have family over at the Netherlands,
I will advice that you keep your trip confidential, as
we are the final moments of the project, and you do
not know what might go wrong by telling even an
innocent person. This is just as a security
precaution.

I await your kind response,

Best regards,
kenneth.


Ah, the fork in the road. Which way to go, which way to go…

Kenneth,

My patient is not doing well, but thank you for asking. But, on that note, I am trying to loosely plan my trip. I currently have one of my aides, back in the office, working out the details while I am staying on the other side of the state. I expect to be here for the duration of the week.

Assuming all goes according to plan I anticipate being there, in the Netherlands, next week.

Confidence is not an issue. It’s part of my career. My clients trust in me to keep thier wishes between them and myself. I have been practicing this for about 45 years, only having my license revoked twice.

I know you have been requesting my phone and fax numbers, but I am rarely home, and the only number you would get any form of answer with would be my office, which I would not feel comfortable with. In that case all I have is a fax number, if you would like it.

Regards,

Jack


Sunday May 23rd, 2004

I suppose I should check my email more often

Thursday:

Dear Sir,

I am writing to find ot what the position is?

Please do let me have the numbers.

Thank you.
Kenneth.

Saturday:

Dear Sir,

I am writing to say that I have not heard from you in
a while.
Please do let me know what is goin on.

Kenneth.

Sunday:

Dear Sir,

I am writing to ask what the position is?

Please do let me have the numbers, I asked for so I
can give the bank, as the deposit company in the
Netherlands will have to contact you first to schedule
and appointment for you, before you can go there.

I await your prompt response,

Kenneth.


I think it’s time for me to fly!

My apologies, Kenneth. As you know, I have been working with a patient of mine, and it has kept me very busy. Unfortunately my patient was in terrible misery, and decided to take its own life. I just feel fortunate that I could see them to the end.

As for my numbers, they are as follows:

Home number – 1-219-XXX-XXXX
Fax number – 1-815-327-4104

Now that I have time I am making plans to come to the Netherlands. Where will I need to go. I must have this information to plan my flight.

Regards,

Jack


Monday May 24th, 2004

Christ! How do they send mail that fast to each other?! Hmmm….

Dear Sir,

Very sorry to hear about your patient.

A lot of progress has been made by the numbers you
sent to me. The Attorney was able to submit them to
the bank, and the bank has also sent a letter back to
the Attorney, acknoledging receipt, and approving that
BaseLine Securities will contact you. I have been
trying to send the letter the bank sent via your fax
number, but it has been impossible, but I will keep on
trying until I get it across.

However, the Bank has said in its letter that Baseline
will be contacting you anytime from now, and I am very
sure they will contact via phone fax. Please do let
know as soon as you are contacted.

Also please confirm receipt of the fax from me.

Last but not the least, I employ you to keep this
transcation confidential as in from your family in the
Netherlands, as one has to be more than careful.

Thank you.
Kenneth Tyler.


Ass Doctor? Why not?

Kenneth,

It seems that all is in good order. I received a fax a short while ago, from Pauline Mason. Is this who I should be receiving from?

I believe I have stated before that I deal with confidentiality issues regularly. Many years ago I used to be a Protologist. For many that come to me it could be very uncomfortable, in many ways! This will not be a problem.

No worries, Mr. Tyler.

And to where will I be going, so I can make travel arrangements. I guess the more I think about it the more anxious I get.

Jack


Wednesday May 26th, 2004

Well SHIT! I missed his call!

Listen to the messege.


Okay, now I’m supposed to hear from someone else? So much for keeping a low profile on this one. Maybe I’m just the only who’s not supposed to tell… hahaha!

Dear Jack,

I am writing to ask if you have heard from Baseline?

Please I am relying on you to give me information on
their contact.

I await your urgent response.

Best regards,
Kenneth.


Okay, so I never really heard from “Baseline”! Think he’ll notice?

Kenneth,

I have just heard from them. Where do we go from here, and where will I be
going once I reach the Netherlands? I am currently making my travel plans.

Thank you,

Jack


Dear Sir,

Thank you for your email?

Thank God you have heard from Baseline! Please what
did they say? Please i will like to know every detail?
when did they ask you to come?

I await your urgent response,

Kenneth.


Personally, I though Baseline Securities was quite rude!!

Kenneth,

Well, quite frankly I took the liberty to contact them myself, since I
have a little free time. I’m not sure they understood what I was talking
about, and they seemed to be in a little bit of a hurry to get off of the
phone with me.

Not being too sure of what they were referring to, all I could understand
of the coversation was that I could go to the Netherlands, or anywhere
else in Europe, anytime I wish, and that I did not need thier approval.

I am, however, still at a loss as to where I am supposed to go, and it’s
starting to get a little frustrating for a gentleman of my age, to get to
the point.

I am of fair health, but I tire easy, and stress does not suit me well. I
realize you have done so much already, but can you please find a way to
aquire this information for me, Kenneth.

Thank you,

Jack


Thursday May 27th, 2004

How did I find them? Let me count how many there are! The question is – which one?

Dear Sir,

Thank you for your email.

Please how did you get their contact information?

I cant collect the information for you Sir, you will
have to collect the information yourself.

Please give me the information you used in contacting
them.

Thank you,
kenneth.


But I was just trying to do some of the leg work!!

Kenneth,

Well, to answer your question, I looked them up in a program called Internet Exploder. It’s a program that was already on this computer when I got it. As soon as I open it a program called Google comes up.

I have been told by some of my assistants, who are much more computer saavy than myself, that the Google program is the easiest way to find information. They told me that if you just type in what you’re looking for it will come right up.

I don’t particularly care for computers, so normally I would let them handle this process. In this situation, though, I thought it maight be best to try it myself – so I did.

The first item that was listed was Baseline Securities in New York. I assumed that, since the funds were located in Australia, but I will be required to travel to the Netherlands, that it was only logical that this must be the location, since it was directly between the two locations.

Is this not correct? Do I need to locate another company that shares the same name? I’m sorry, this is just so confusing to me.

Jack


Friday May 28th, 2004

He’s finding me amusing. At least I can humor somebody!

Dear Sir,

I have received your email, and I find it quite
amusing. At any rate, let us wait for baselone to
contact you, and like I told you they are in the
Netherlands, and not newyork.

I told you that your phone keeps going to answering
machine, i hope you have not provided an internet
phone for this transaction?

Please let me know when you are contacted.

Best regards,
Kenneth.


Sunday May 30th, 2004

Don’t piss off Dr. Death!

I’m sorry, Kenneth, but I do not find this amusing. At this point I am not
sure this has been worth my time. I have tried my best to do some of the
leg work to help get things moving along, and you think this is funny?

I have no idea as to what an internet phone is. The number I gave is a
number that only I can check. I thought you wanted this kept in
confidence. It just happens that I have not been available to answer when
someone was calling.

I have tried to return the phone call, but apparently I cannot understand
the accent of the person who left the messege very well. Fortunately I was
able to understand the person whose number I did have, however incorrect
it was. He was helpful enough to let me know that I must have a wrong
number and, since I called him twice, it must be costing me a fortune!

I will do my best to be available when the gentleman calls next time, but
I am rapidly losing my patience!

Jack


Tuesday June 1st, 2004

“Have you heard from them yet?” Hmmm… let me think…

Dear Sir,

I am writing to ask if you have heard anyhting from
Baseline? Please do let me know.

Thank you very much.

Best regards,
Kenneth.


All work and no play make Jack a dull boy.

Kenneth,

To start, please call me Jack. We’ve been doing this for over a month now,
so you can for-go the pleasantries. They are no longer necessary, and I
don’t care for being called “sir.”

To answer your question – yes I’ve heard from Base Line Securities in
Amsterdam. This was in the form of a fax. I have not heard from them by
telephone, as they always seem to call during inconvenient times! On the
other hand, everytime I try to call them a rather nice tard tells me I
have the wrong number!!

Is there any other way to do this? I’m getting too old for this. I’d like
to go see my family, since I now have made plans, before I die! Why can I
not visit Base Line Securities directly, once I am in the area? Would that
not be proof enough that I am who I say I am? And perhaps you can meet me
in front of the building, and we will leave there as cabeça de dung.

Jack


Boy, this guy is getting annoying! Maybe I should just tell him that I’m flying over there, whether he likes it or not!

Dear Jack,

Thank you for your email. I have read your email, and
the points have been carefully noted with thanks.

I am very happy that Baseline has contacted you, as
this shows to a large extent that everything is going
as planned.

However, there is no way I can give you the
information of Baseline, as you will have to please
call them to discuss with them. Please do call them,
so you can discuss with them.

Thank you and God bless,

Best regards,
Kenneth tyler


Wednesday June 2nd, 2004

You know – telemarketers are bad enough. Can you imagine if they had an accent?! I could’ve sworn this guy said he was going to give me information on how to collect my head!

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